Here again trying to get up..
I can’t help but to start a new life.
You get so scared at first.
But now it seems as if I’m finally ready.
I was abandoned left with nothing.
Depressing but it’s a fact of life.
When I lost everything I was associated to.
I had nothing ..
No friends, no acquaintances, no life to call my own..
I lost my job. It’s been two months now..
I was so ashamed of what happened that I didn’t
tell anybody about it.
I actually resigned, it was a forced resignation.
I feel like a failure..
I can’t admit to myself that I messed up..
Of all people!..
My pride won’t let me admit or confess it to anyone..
I find that the longer you stay home under this
circumstances the more you lose confidence..
Indeed it’s best to keep on failing and trying to
look for a job rather than stay home and wallow in
your misery.
But I wished it was as easy as writing it like this..
I’m beginning to question god.
But I know I’m just being ridiculous because
I was the one who chose this path.
I’m just so frustrated of not finding a good paying
job with my calling..
It’s easier to find the job you don’t want..
I’m supposed to leave home today and apply for a job.
But my heart is really not into it.
It’s saying `not that again’…
I stopped by a mall where I am now checking my emails
hoping that I would have an opportunity at least to get
to where I want to go..
